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Thoughts from the middle

We’ve reached the middle. Six months have come and gone. Set their mark in our memories and bid adieu.

It’s an apt moment to look at how the time was spent. A period to pause and look at past actions, view current states, and determine next moves. A brief commercial break to ruminate on the last act, if you will.

These are the thoughts whirling through my head from January to July…

1. Keep going. Don’t give up even when you think you’re at the bottom. While in January, I toyed with the notion of throwing my dreams away (temporarily, at least) and getting a “real” job, an “office” job, I held on. Thankfully, some kind of sense or voice in my head (and the wise words from a friend, “the people who have the guts to keep going in their darkest hour are the ones who make it.”) made me stick it out. And I now call myself a “working writer.”

Dreaming in the grass2. Visualization must be accompanied with action, and vice versa. This year, more than any other, I’ve adopted the practice of visualizing. I sit in a patch of sunlight on my living room floor, soak in the bathtub with candles flickering on the walls, and lay in the grass staring at the green leaves above my head. Sometimes for a mere five minutes, other times for up to an hour. And I picture my life. I run through scenarios from my future. Sometimes I tear up in happiness. I’m a sap, it’s true. A few of the most significant words spoken to me in the past year were, “If you can dream…”

Read thus far: The Power of Your Subconscious Mind, Think and Grow Rich, and The Secret.

3. If something causes a physical reaction in you, something that messes with your moral compass, voice your opinion. Don’t be shy. Be constructive about it and don’t apologize. Not everyone will agree with you, but that’s the beauty of having a voice. And nothing beats a riveting debate.

4. People, even strangers, are generous. They want to see me, and anyone else with a dream, succeed. Much gratitude.

5. Be patient. Things will happen when all the stars are aligned, figuratively speaking. Don’t force it. There’s a fine line between being persistent and being desperate. Trust that things will happen when the timing is right. Most importantly, believe. Believe in yourself.

6. Keep your life filled with great people – people who will inspire you and people doing extraordinary things. Prioritize who you spend your time with. Choose those who fulfill you in some way, rather than drain you. It’s not personal. People change, friendships evolve. You will know in your heart which people to grow with. And there is nothing better, nothing more soul-enriching, than those close friends who make you laugh, see you cry, support your dreams, and listen to you with an open mind and heart. And the friends who you provide the same for. Give as you wish to receive.

7. I can accomplish anything when I really focus. This year I finished a screenplay. First draft (celebratory post here), second, third, fourth, and a dozen others. I put it down, I picked it up. But I finished. And I’m proud of it and me. Celebrate accomplishments as you go… so you can make more. Now I face the next task… of doing something with it.

8. Someone may be watching you. Seriously. There are eyes on you from the shadows and secret admirers lurking. Some may even send you anonymous emails extolling their affection.

9. Energy is a weird and powerful phenomenon. The energy you give off, the vibes you receive. People may read you differently than you intend to be perceived. Daydreaming can be misconstrued as boredom, anxiety or nerves as snobbery or anger, and concentration as annoyance. Communicate how you’re feeling so you don’t give someone the wrong idea.

10. Stretch every day. Or fall under the wrath of ridiculous physiotherapy and massage bills. Purring encouraged mid-stretch.

I’m still learning, growing, moving. I have setbacks, I have surges forward. It’s all part of life. But ultimately, I remain on two feet, not one. Poised and balanced, feeling the wind sway me in all directions either trying to make me fall or testing my stature. Either way, I’m still standing. And so excited about what’s to come.

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